Acceptance vs. Approval

And.... here we go again.

Much confusion seems to exist about these two words. So let's clarify, shall we?

Acceptance: 

 Webster's Dictionary
Function: noun
1 : the act of accepting
2 : the quality or state of being accepted or acceptable
Synonyms -

• acknowledgment
• admission
• compliance

• cooperation
• recognition

Approval:

  Webster's Dictionary
Function: noun
: an act or instance of approving
Synonyms - 

• blessing 
• confirmation
• consent
• endorsement
• go-ahead

• green light
• permission

Okay then...  
So, hopefully, by now we can agree that just because we ACCEPT something doesn't necessarily mean that we APPROVE of it. We accept that our kids, parents, friends, make choices that we don't agree with. For example, binge drinking, smoking, hanging out with people who aren't "good for them," walking out on a job, etc. 
That doesn't mean that we APPROVE of it.

When you make choices, which you have every right to do, it seems to me that it's not reasonable to assume that others approve of your choices, even if they accept that you have a right to make them. 
Let's please never get that confused. 

I accept that sometimes my cats leave fur or claw marks on the furniture, or "color outside the lines" of the litter box. That, in NO way, means that I approve of this.  In fact, I deplore it. I love the kitties; don't get me wrong. And I accept that part of having a cat is dealing with strange (or, normal for a cat,) behavior. But I don't, and won't ever, approve of my cat clawing up the hamper or the corner of the couch, or leaving parts of dead things at my doorstep that I have to clean up, or "missing his aim" when using the litter box. 
I do NOT approve.

The same holds true for decisions made by those I love. 

Just because I ACCEPT your choices, doesn't mean in any way that I AGREE with them, or APPROVE of them.  Let's keep this very clear, please. You are free to make choices, and I would never try to take that freedom away from you. You are also free to deal with the consequences - I will not pay them for you. And, just because I accept your freedom to choose, does NOT mean that I always agree with your choices, or think that they are fair, wise, or even sane. 

If you are my friend, or a member of my family, I promise to love you unconditionally.
However, I do not promise to agree with you, approve of every choice you make, or support you in what I consider to be a very bad choice. (I WILL, however, drive you home from the bar in the case that your choice on any given night is to drink too much!) 
;o)

But, I'm fair. Just as I can't approve of every decision or choice you make, I would never expect you to approve of every choice or decision I make. But I would ask that you accept my choices, as I accept yours. 

It's called Respect. 

I respect your right to be you. 
I respect your right to make your own choices.
I respect you. 

Out of that respect, I also reserve the right to DISapprove of a choice you make, whether you think I'm crazy or not. I don't disrespect YOU. I just can't fathom your reasons for making that particular choice.  It's called being two different people, I think. We all make the best choices we can, with the tools that we have, hopefully after considering the long-term effects our choices will have on ourselves and others in the long run. 

And so concludes today's "Word Clarification." 

I gladly accept your approval or disapproval of this little missive. 
:o)